Ten steps to being likable and loved.
By Susanna Newsonen
Being a human is an incredible thing—but it’s not always easy. What you should or shouldn’t do isn’t always clear, and it can leave you feeling confused and overwhelmed. You weren’t exactly given a guidebook for life at school, even though you might have learned to count. It turns out you need a lot more than that to be a good human being.
The reality is that we are a real mishmash of people and cultures across this beautiful planet. In fact, it’s exactly that which makes our planet so wonderfully diverse. Yet, there is one thing that we all have in common: We like to feel good. Hence, I’ve compiled a list of things that most (if not all) humans appreciate.
Below you will find your guide to being a good human being and behaving in ways that make others feel good, too.
1. Be kind.
In a world where you can be anything, be kind. To yourself and to others. Both offline and online. You never know how much that other person might need your kindness. Often, it’s more than you think.
2. Listen.
In our noisy world, it’s sometimes hard to feel heard. Be the person that makes someone feel heard. Really listen to everything they have to say. Ask them how they are and listen to their answer fully. Let them speak as long as they want to.
3. Be non-judgmental.
With yourself and with others. Everyone is doing the best they can with the knowledge they have, including you. Adopt an attitude of tolerance and accept that we are all different. That’s what makes each one of us so unique and life so interesting.
4. Support people’s decisions.
Even when you might not agree with them. Trust that they are doing what they feel is right for them, and respect that. Everyone has the right to live a life true to them. Everyone has the right to make their own choices.
5. Be someone’s biggest cheerleader.
You can never have too many supporters. Encourage your people to go after their dreams and support them in their journey in any way you can. Let them know that they are not alone. Let them know that you are there for them.
6. Be polite.
This seems like an obvious one, but it’s amazing how rude you can come across when sending an email or message in a moment of frustration. If you’re in a negative place, don’t send anything. Write a draft if you need to, but do not send it until you’ve had a chance to look at it when you’re feeling good and calm.
The same applies to spoken word. Take a breath before you lash out. Take a moment to re-center so that you can approach the challenge from a better place.
7. Live a life that’s true to you.
There are too many people living lives that someone else told them to live. Don’t be one of them. Live a life that is true to you. Live the life that you’re yearning to live. When you do, you’ll inspire others to do the same.
You’ve only got one shot at life—and, let’s face it, none of us know how long it will be. So make the most out of it. Starting today.
8. Take care of yourself.
If you don’t take care of yourself, no one else will. You are responsible for your emotional, physical, and mental well-being. Take charge of it and take good care of it. That’s the only way you will show up as your best possible self. And the world deserves to see you at your best.
9. Take care of others.
Sometimes people aren’t prepared to ask for help—so offer it regularly. The people who need it the most are often the ones who are trying to put a strong front out to the world. Don’t be fooled by this, and offer your help to those you think might be in need of it.
10. Smile if you feel it.
Never underestimate the power of a genuine smile. It will warm the recipient’s heart and make them want to smile too. As a bonus, you’ll feel better too. Everyone who smiles does.
Originally published at Psychology Today